Friends come and go, but is FAMILY really forever? The day my father called to tell me my mom had cancer, I hung up the phone, turned to my husband and said, “Well, that's the end of my family.” I said it, but I didn't believe it. I didn't want to believe it, though I … Continue reading Letting Go of Family
What is Your Purpose in Living? Christians and Muslims (actual believers, not in name only because they celebrate Christmas or Eid al-Fitr) believe the purpose of living is to serve and reflect their God’s will to ensure their assent to heaven after death. Jews focus on the present rather than an afterlife. They believe humans … Continue reading The Purpose of Life
250 yrs later, we’re back to Civil War… My father is a fervent Republican. My mother was a Democrat. I once saw him put his fist through the maple cabinet an inch from my mom’s head because her vote was going to cancel his in the second Reagan election. Though he never hit her, connected … Continue reading Today’s Great Divide
“I saw someone die today, Mom,” my daughter told me on the phone, her voice four octaves higher than normal, like she’d been sucking on helium. “Where are you?” I heard street noise in the background. “I’m on the 101. I’m driving home from the hospital.” Again, her voice was...off—too high, too cheery. “I saw … Continue reading On Raising a Doctor
For as long as I can remember I wanted to be a mom. I was absolutely convinced I could parent better than my mother. My father was the breadwinner — king of our small kingdom — and more into himself than raising the two kids he produced and the one he adopted. I became a … Continue reading Letting Go of Adult Kids
Women are inherently maternal—raised to put others before self. This is the cost... I think I may be broken. Not the quirky, cute type, but really cracked, unable to compartmentalize my desires from those of the people I love. I don’t stand up for what I want because I often lose sight of what that … Continue reading Are You Broken Like Me?
Typically, on Sunday mornings my husband and I share articles from the New York Times. He’ll often read me pieces while I prepare breakfast or vice versa, and we’ll discuss the ones that pique our interest. The year-end edition of the Sunday Magazine runs detailed obituaries on a handful of famous and infamous people who … Continue reading Do You Matter?
How do you get good at anything? Practice. How do you get great? Obsession — Practice most all the time. Pick any famous author, artist, or musician, and they’ll all have obsession in common. And while we, the public, enjoy the fruits of their creative labors, those closest to these individuals were/are generally left wanting more … Continue reading The Price of Brilliance
THANKSGIVING 1991 The sweet, cloying scent of death was veiled by the sharpness of cleanser in the antiseptic lobby of the Home. Chrome handrails lined the light pink walls. A hunched elderly man clutched onto the railing as he shuffled along in slow motion. Each step looked pained. Pasty white skin, his eyelids drooped over … Continue reading Scene from an L.A. Thanksgiving
I’m no longer, and will never again be my kids’ demigod... I wanted kids for as long as I can remember. Have 2. Adopt 1. I was absolutely sure I could raise them better than my mom [and dad]. I’d give them ground instead of ripping it away with critical judgments. I’d show my love … Continue reading Empty-Nesting IRL
